Today we decided to revisit one of our favorite “crazy grandma” stories. Our mom is still in Seattle trying to finish sorting out our late grandmother’s estate. We pray that she can wrap up soon and come home!
It was the summer of 2005 or 2006. Since I was a school teacher I had time off and poor Dave was working or going to school. I had some free airline miles that I needed (or wanted to use) so I decided to fly to Washington D.C. and visit my friend Andrea and her beautiful new baby, and then pay a few bucks and take Jet Blue and visit my Houston BFF, Stephanie who had just moved to Boston. I think I planned a week in DC and a week in Boston. DC was great and then I headed to Boston. I was very impressed with Jet Blue. It was the first time I flew them and was amazed at all leather seats, everyone had their own tv, and they were super friendly. I told Dave I wanted to invest in Jet Blue (as if we had any money to invest in anything). He said, nobody invests in airlines, they are a terrible investment. Ok, first lesson learned.
The next lesson I learned was Boston was HOT!!!! I think they were having a really BAD heat wave. You think this Houston girl could handle the heat, but we don’t really go outside in the horrible heat. We stay in our nice air conditioned cars and houses. Boston is still hit and miss when it comes to air. Stephanie had a very cute small apartment located in downtown “Little Italy”. She would work all day and I would explore. I was so hot that I admit I spent most of my day seeking air-conditioning places
Lesson three was that it seemed that nobody in “Little Italy” accepted anything but cash. I didn’t understand how we were in modern age and they only took cash. Of course I am not naïve and knew the reason they only took cash. I complained to my Italian mom and she made some excuse. One night Stephanie suggested dinner at her favorite little restaurant across the street from her apartment. It was a wonderful, quaint restaurant and I wanted to treat because she was so hospitable. The dinner was delicious and of course we had lots of wine. The bill came to over $100.00, which was no problem. Or so I thought, until I was told “cash only”. There was an ATM conveniently located right outside.
Lesson four was that you should not tell your mom you are in Boston because she will tell her Italian mom.
Me “I am having a blast in Boston”
Mom “I told Grandma you were in Boston staying in “Little Italy”.
Me “Please tell me you didn’t.”
Mom “Grandma told me she wants you to buy her a cheesecake in Boston and send it to her in Seattle”
Me “WHAT!!!! I am sure they have cheesecakes in Seattle”
Mom “Nope, she wants one from Boston”
Me “ Ok, but you owe me…..big time”.
Mom “Ok, just get her a cheesecake”
So I go to the local bakery the day before I leave and explain the situation. Freighting enough the workers completely understand my situation and agreed to freeze it and tell me to pick it up on my way to airport and just carry it on the plane. Talk about having an albatross around your neck. I just wanted to go home.
The next morning I pick up my package and head to the airport. All of the screeners were Italian guys who gave me funny looks for a second and then I say “Crazy Italian grandma wants one”. They then all laugh and say they understand. It was like some secret “Italian” society that only “true Italians” understand.
As I was waiting to board my flight, cheesecake in hand, Barbara Bush (wife of a former U.S. president) walked right past me to board my same flight to Houston. I am a scared flyer, but felt a little safer because surely this plane would not go down.
Life was good and I returned to the scorching heat of Houston summer. I immediately put the cheesecake in my freezer when I got home. I would deal with it later. The problem was that my grandmother wanted the cheesecake, yesterday.
Grandma “Corrin where is my cheesecake?”
Me “Grandma, I just got back, I will sort it out”.
Grandma, “Corrin where is my cheesecake?”
So I decide I have to go send the cheesecake. I went to the local post office. I remember walking in to the building with a frozen cheesecake and nothing else.
Me “I would like to send this cheesecake to Seattle. How much will it cost me to overnight it? “
Worker “ Some crazy number $70.00 or $100.00. They mentioned dry ice and other options (I already had $30.00 invested in the cheesecake).
Me “Nope, that is way too expensive. How much for 3 or 4 days?”
Worker “$50.00 or $60.00”.
Me “Nope. What is the cheapest way for me to get the Seattle?”
Worker “We can just stick it in a box and send it. We don’t know how long it will take.”
Me “How much?”
I go home and ironically a few minutes later my Grandmother calls me to ask about her cheesecake. I eagerly reported that I sent her the cheesecake. She was happy.
Grandma calls, “Corrin where is my cheesecake?”
Me “It is on its way”.
Grandma “Corrin, where is my cheesecake?”
Me “Grandma, it is on its way”
She starts realizing that this cheesecake will lose its freshness as the days go by. I stopped answering her phone calls and just listened to her voicemails. Every day they got meaner and meaner.
On a side note. When Dave and I got married she insisted on sending us a $100.00 check. I told her she didn’t have to do that. I really did not want her to do that. I knew the strings attached. My mom made me cash the check and of course I sent a nice thank you note.
So long story short, the cheesecake finally arrived from Houston, Texas to Seattle, Washington after 10 long days in the summer heat. Did she eat it? Of course she did. According to my mom she scraped off the mold off the top and wanted her $100.00 wedding gift back.